Veni, Vedi… Just Me?
Trapped on the couch, watching crap TV while DSM and the Concubine carry my head cold germs to the rest of the family, I have discovered something potentially disturbing about myself, dear Hooligans. I...
View ArticleI Still Rule You
HAPPY NEW YEAR, MOTHERFUCKERS!!!!! Another day, another argument with “George“ – Hoody Hoo: I’m actually kinda pissed the ‘Pocolypse didn’t happen… now I can’t use all my skills. “George”: Oh, like...
View ArticleIiiiiiiii-KEA! (Gesundheit!)
Alright, it’s confession time in the Hoody Hoo Household again, Hooligans. mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa, Lord, I am not worthy to receive thee… My name is Hoody Hoo… and I hate IKEA. Hear me...
View ArticleSpacing Is Important
Okay, so it’s always struck my inner Beavis as inappropriately hilarious that “therapist” and “the rapist” are just a misplaced space away from a Monty Python sketch. But now I’m paying the price (as...
View ArticleEvidence for the Defence, Milord
(Because if I ever have to have an actual trial I want to have it in England because 1) Wigs and 2) Hot little Adama boy on Law and Order: Great Britain and 3) FUCKING. WIGS.) Anyhoo… Y’all bitches...
View ArticleHey, Dumbass!
Well, it seems Hoody Hoo’s Help for Hebrews isn’t taking off as the big successful get-rich-quick scheme humanitarian effort I was hoping it would be… so I’m forced to make me some damn money help...
View ArticleFinger Chickens
As opposed to Chicken Fingers… mmmm, chicken… SCENE: Hoody and Dear Sweet Mama are watching the New Year’s Resolution episode of “American Dad,” in which Deputy Director Bullock wants to chop off...
View ArticleScorecard Update
For those of you who are playing along with our home game, please note: The character formerly known as “George” will now be known as “Gilbert.” Both in the Anne of Green Gables way and the BBC Being...
View ArticleMoney for Nothin’
And if you’re not singing the Dire Straits song right now, I don’t know if we can still be friends… although that song uses the word “faggot” and I try not to use hurtful words like “faggot”… you...
View ArticleDrunk School Digest
So, confession time: Two Christmases ago (12/25/11), Hoody went to her Bad-Ass Cousin’s house (you know, the 0ne who always got you in trouble as a kid – that one) and got, as Hoody does tend to get,...
View ArticleTwo Trailer Park Girls Go ‘Round the Outside
Yes, Hooligans, it’s time for yet another installment of everyone’s favorite program… ADVENTURES WITH DEAR SWEET MAMA Scene: Two Southern girls (Hoody and DSM) are at a random NJ diner. DSM has...
View ArticleF**k You, Betty!
Sorry I’ve been incommunicado for so long — my new Summertime Resolution is to blog every day. So strap on in, bitches! Once upon a time, two beautiful princesses named Hoody Hoo and Dear Sweet Mama...
View ArticleI Shop, Therefore I Am
So DSM and I went out shopping today — just half-assed, goofing off shopping plus a small grocery store trip, nothing major (which is good, ’cause I didn’t find any of the things I was looking for)....
View ArticleSay It with WHAAAAAT?
Hooligans, I can do nothing but present to you, this: For those of you who, like me, are retinally-challenged, that right there is a no-shit STORE-BOUGHT card that says, no lie; “I Like Having Sex with...
View ArticleChasing Hoody
Okay, Hooligans, pay attention: Silent Bob: So, there’s me and Amy. And we’re all inseparable, right? Big time in love. Then four months down the road, the idiot gear kicks in, and I ask about the...
View ArticleTwilight Zone
So, here’s the Mike Sorrentino, Hooligans: SCENE: INT.: HOODY’S ROOM, EVENING: Dear Sweet Mama: Hey, Hoody, could you get my clothes out of the dryer? Hoody: Sure, no problem. Are they dry now?...
View ArticleI Got Me a…
…chicken? No…. Venereal Disease? No, fuck y’all… Pizza? Yes, but that’s not the point… I GOT ME A JOB!!!!!!!!!!!! I’ll be doing weekend news for two radio stations up here,...
View ArticleLike, TOTALLY!
First real day on the new job under my belt, and I’m chillin’ watching this great series on NatGeo: ”The 80′s: The Decade That Made Us.” So Hooligans, it’s time for... POETRY SLAM! We grew up in the...
View ArticleCanna Hoody Getta Ho?
(Yeah, I know it’s been awhile, but I’m back now, bitches! I can’t promise posts every day just yet, but how about we go for 3 times a week and see how she flies? You know I love all y’all!) Catching...
View ArticleFor Your Viewing Pleasure
As we all know, television viewership takes up a significant portion of my day (largely because I’m holed up in my room hiding from the increasingly-evil Concubine). So let’s all pick up our clickers...
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